Allowing the Writer Within to Shine Through
It just hit me: I’m a writer.
It seems pretty silly that I’ve been blogging here at WorkLoveLife for eight months now, and I’ve only just realized that I’m a writer. This is not unique to me, I know. As blogging becomes more and more popular, others I read have questioned at what point you become a writer. And still others have argued against calling yourself a blogger at all.
I’ve come to realize in the past few months that writing has a place in my soul. It allows me to purge, it allows me to mull and remember, and it allows me to connect. And I love words. I took Latin throughout high school, which really boosted my vocabulary. I love the idea in linguistics that the more words we know, the more efficiently and effectively we are able to communicate. I love finding the perfect word or set of a words that most accurately conveys what I’m trying to say. And I even like that I can’t always find them… indescribable is a good place to be, in my book.
But today, I realized that I am writer. Not just a blogger or a lover of words or a novice, even.
The past few days have been hectic – work is hectic and I have meeting and appointments crammed into every nook and cranny of my waking hours. This evening is my first free evening since Friday. I have a half-marathon I signed up for in two weeks that I am ill-prepared for. Tonight could be a night for training. But when I asked myself do you want to run or do you want to write? Would you like to do the half-marathon or would you like to write? The answer reverberated throughout my head: We want to write.
So I didn’t bring my running clothes. I brought my laptop. Because when I neglect my running, I don’t feel half so unbalanced as when I neglect my writing.
I’d like to be a great many things in my life, and I imagine I wouldn’t be great at many of them, but it sure would be fun. My life coach says that I should honor the Holly Who Writes if I want to – I don’t have to be the Holly Who Runs Marathons right now. That’s pretty amazing to me. I thought if I was one, I couldn’t be the other.
I know that the Holly Who Runs Marathons is inside of me, but right now, it’s time for the Holly Who Writes to shine through. Not everything has to be done at once, and not everything has to be done to the nth degree. What a concept.
Photo courtesy Shiny Things via Flickr Creative Commons.
I believe that you have definitely hit the point when you can call yourself a writer.
Why is it hard to realize that we can be everything (all the different Hollys)just not all at the same time?
I’m learning to be ok deciding what’s most important at the moment–doing that thing, and knowing that life will continue.
When it is time to put on another of my many hats, I’ll know, and I’ll do it.
And you will to. Marathon runner Holly will resurface
Good, freeing realizations there at the end. You truly only have “now”, so you can only be “you, now”. I don’t like categorizing and labelling, so I wouldn’t assign names, but it’s definitely nice to recognize that it’s ok to listen to your gut, find inner peace in the moment, and do what you need to do to be you.
Hey, I think you just inspired my post for the day…
Peace.
It’s funny. I would definitely think of you as a writer. You write so well.
But I don’t ever think of writing as one of my own skills. In fact, I wouldn’t even think to list it on a resume. Maybe we all just doubt ourselves and our writing abilities?
I have thought of myself as a writer since I was 6 or so. It has always been a part of who I am…I can imagine my life without many things, but not without that!
Not everything has to be done at once, and not everything has to be done to the nth degree.
why fervently sharpen my sword
when once adept grow quickly bored
but love one thing
not just some fling
a destiny of which i’m lord
combine your passions holly? if you wrote a book about coffee there’s a good chance i’d buy it
@lifeinthemiddlelane: I know! Well said. I tend to want to be everything all at once. What is it that I’m worried about? I guess that I’ll somehow lose that side of me, or that people will think I’m not doing enough or taking it seriously enough. Like I’m not really a runner if I’m not running a half-marathon like I said I was.
I talked to a friend about this afternoon. It amazes me how time it takes just to take care of myself, to keep myself fed properly, clothed, rested, balanced in the most basic sense. When I try to do everything at once, those are the things that go, along with my less glamorous pursuits, like writing. No one's cheering for you at the finish line of a blog post, and no one congratulates you on successfully feeding yourself for a week. There are no medals for the rigors of therapy or relationship navigation. Except of course sanity & a happy, healthy productive life. Heh.
@d.edlen: I’m all about honoring (as my life coach says – I like it. I imagine bowing to myself) the person I am right now.
Penelope Trunk wrote a nice post about Rosh Hashanah, but I loved how she neatly described who she is right now. Sometimes those labels (which I know psychologists and therapists abhor) help me gain some distance from the chaos of my mind. I can say, this is simply who I am in this moment. Hello, and welcome.
@monica: I definitely think we’re harder on ourselves! Perhaps those of us who respect writing are not quick to refer to ourselves as writers out of respect to the masters. Dunno.
@honey: That’s funny. I’ve thought of myself as an artist since that age, but I also thought my best medium was paint. I’m beginning to think differently now.
@anonymous: Hmm… my ode to coffee? I suppose that could take up a whole book. It sure would be cool to open my cafe, then write about my life in the context of coffee. You may be on to something. Publishers: agree? Just advance me the $$$ from the book to start the shop, and I’m on set!
Holly – I love this post and your writing. You’re a brave writer (your last post comes to mind
); something I hope to be someday, but am still too guarded. Keep up the great work, Holly Who Writes.
Holly – I love your writing, and it’s honesty. I think the best writers reveal themselves in a particular way. Anyone can start a blog and start blurting, but a skillful writer will describe things in a way that brings light to others.
In particular, you have such a gift for descriptive writing (I’m wondering if your artist’s eye translates to the pen, er, keyboard), and reading your writing is pleasant and easy (in the sense that you don’t have to re-read your sentences and wonder what you are getting at, not that the content is simplistic.)
Keep writing!
Please, do not grace us with a hard copy version of your “VCard” story.
Making a public diary of hormonal imbalance does NOT make you a writer. Maybe sobriety is not the best for you.
@angela: Thank you for the kind words!
@milena: I thought about you & your post a lot when I was realizing and writing this. I hope we both keep it up!
Holly, disregard the comment above. Let me enlighten you concerning the Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory with this comic.
Dear “Gen X Corporate Owner” – instead of hiding your snarkasm behind the anonymity of the internet, next time you’d like to bash our friend here, have the chutzpah not to be such a wuss and use your name. You’re obviously very proud of yourself.
Holly, while the post in question might be TMI for some of your readers, your blog is as real and genuine and “of the moment” as you are. Cheers to you and your efforts to grow and better yourself! I really enjoy your writing.
You write, right? So you’re a writer.
Ignore that negative crap.
If writing is your passion, then embrace it. Just remember that if you decide someday to make writing paid profession, you will have to compose something of great substance. To get paid, it will need to appeal to large market. Writing is an art, just as composing, painting, and sculpting.
It is a difficult and very selective market to break into. Once you make a passion your career, you will have to focus on subjects that sell. What sells may not be what you want to write. Many bloggers will never be published writers, nor seek to be labeled as such. Once self-labeled, you allow others to scrutinize and judge your work. It’s not unfair, it’s life.
how wonderful it is to find an outlet for your voice. You’re a beautiful writer Holly, keep it up.
the thing about blogging is that it’s so new.
being totally honest and transparent in your writing is going to take you on a journey whose destination nobody can predict because people haven’t been blogging long enough for us to know.
the point is that you, holly, aren’t holding back, and that’s rare.
keep riding the wave. it is you, not i, that is on to something…
- masked poet
Holly, I can totally relate (though I don’t seem to crave the writing quite so much). I had challenges even thinking of myself as a writer (still not sure I am) even after blogging for over 3 years and getting articles written, published and reprinted.
I’m a little better at allowing myself to be called a writer, but I still kind of run away from it. The two things that made me really start to realize that I could be a writer…1) I saw my article reposted on Pink’s website – a magazine chose to reprint what I wrote?!?!?! and 2) when I realize that I’ll often avoid writing an article, but writing blog posts or vice versa.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
There really is nothing like that moment when you realize you’re a writer. I used to hide my writer identity because I thought I wasn’t ‘successful’ enough to earn the term.
Now I know better. Now I say it loud and proud. Claiming myself as a writer is one of the best things I ever did.
And if you’re a word nerd, Lifehacker (lifehacker.com)posted earlier this year a whole list of the best online tools for those who love words and language. It’s heaven! Just search on best-online-language-tools-for-word-nerds
My favourite site is dictionary.com. I especially love word of the day….
I believe you become a writer when you can’t think of anything else but the desire to write and eventually transform that desire into action.